Just as Black Hole or the original Battlestar Galactica series saw the light of day after the success of Star Wars, this clearly derivative, post-Lord of the Rings meets Pirates of the Caribbean sword flick is told with so much earnestness that it all appears a bit silly.

Drawn from the pages of the comic book, Kane cuts and slashes his way through numerous baddies, as the incessant “clink/clink” masks the fact that the story is pretty darned boring. There’s little in the way of novelty after a while, and when a Balrog clone shows up for good measure, it’s all finished neatly (and clearly within the allotted CGI budget).

Lacking much humour or spirit, this both missed the epic nature of LOTR and the genuine zeal of most swordplay flicks, from POTC to Princess Bride to Captain Blood. This somber, drenched-in-rain misery piece simply doesn’t ever come together, and even as a MM distraction it disappoints.